Individual Counseling

Life Hurts!

Have you ever had that experience of going through your day, doing what you must do, working on projects, getting things done – and then WHACK! You stub your toe, whack your head, or smash your finger?

That experience throws off your groove. If it hurts bad enough, everything comes to a halt (unless you are Ironman and embrace the pain and keep going).

You feel the pain, maybe cuss a few times, assess how bad the injury is, and then do your best to attend to it as needed.

And you may get professional help to prevent further complications. When people notice the stitches or bandages, you may tell the story of what happened or say, “It’s nothing.”

Some hurts heal fast.

You know that an injury will eventually heal. Depending on the severity, you continue to attend to the wound until the pain subsides and the healing process unfolds. After a couple of weeks, you feel pretty good and will likely forget about the injury soon enough.

You generally know what to do with physical pain, and you likely know when to get help. Yet, something changes when you slide into a world of mental and emotional pain.

Mental and emotional pain causes you to feel flawed in some way. And flawed in some way, you must not be worthy of acceptance or belonging.

So, you go on. You carry this belief and hurt of being flawed. You carry that burden inside wherever it came from, like significant life changes, trauma, or small negative things that happened over time. And now it shapes your attitudes and interactions with others, like that voice in your head that keeps beating you up.

Hiding the hurt

Over time, the pain festers and becomes infected. You know it’s there, yet you continually try to distract yourself or turn away from it. Or you hide it, pushing it down and hoping it will go away eventually.

But that’s the weird thing about emotional and mental pain. It only gets worse in isolation and seems like it will never heal.

We wouldn’t hide a physical injury from our friends and family, so why do we hide emotional and mental injuries from them at times? And why don’t they heal mental injuries like physical wounds?

Don’t hide anymore.

Well, you don’t have to hide anymore. And mental and emotional wounds do heal just like physical ones.

I will work with you to understand your true self – who you are at the core (which you are probably mistaking with your flaws) – and help you see all parts of you in the context of your relationship with yourself.

I know, it sounds strange, right. Think of it like this…

Everyone has different neurological pathways that developed as a result of life experiences. These neurological pathways, or ‘mindsets,’ consist of feelings, thoughts, beliefs, body sensations, and images.

Together, these neurological pathways make up parts of self. Some parts hold wounds or carry negative beliefs.

Healing is possible.

In individual counseling, the work we do together consists of differentiating parts from who you are, getting to know all parts of you, and when you are ready, helping you let go of those parts that cause negative beliefs.

Of course, this is just one way I will work with you. I’ve found it to be one of the most helpful for people. But we may also work on developing skills or new coping strategies. And we will likely spend some time trying to process and make sense of what you are learning and how you are growing.

People who work with me describe feeling a sense of greater calm and peace and freedom to engage in life differently with more intentionality and purpose than before.

I can help.

Like physical injuries, the sooner you seek help for mental and emotional wounds, the more quickly the healing process can begin.

You see – your brain can heal. Long-term hope, healing, and joy are possible no matter what you experienced in your life or where you are now.

Call me at (435) 610-1810 for a free consultation.